Bitterness and Healing with Tera Carissa Hodges

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Walking in truth is a path less traveled, and it’s so encouraging when you find someone on that path who is bravely and successfully moving forward!  This is exactly what I felt like during a recent interview with Tera Carissa Hodges.  When I originally connected with this powerful woman of God to talk about a blog post that would enlighten my readers, she suggested that she pray on it for a few weeks, and then get back with me.  On the day of our interview, the topic that had weighed on her spirit was: bitterness and healing.  Bitterness develops when you’ve been waiting for or anticipating something and then are disappointed, because it didn’t happen when or how you expected it to. Keep reading for more on our candid conversation about how you can take back your life from the enemy and avoid developing bitterness during the wait.tera-carissa-hodges

BeautifulWildFree: What has been prominent in your own prayer time?

Tera Carissa Hodges: What has been heavy in my own prayer time is the poverty mentality that many people have.  This poverty mentality is simply a mindset that causes people to feel like they missed out or to feel as if they have to cause other people to lose in order for them to personally win.

In my experience, with 95% of my coaching clients, a central problem is women feeling like they lost out.  They wonder “When is it going to be my time” or they constantly think “Nothing is happening for me but it is happening for her.”  But know this – comparison is the thief of joy.

BeautifulWildFree: What are some of the indicators of bitterness women should look out for?

Tera Carissa Hodges: When a woman is deceived in this area, she’s exhibiting characteristics such as disliking people she doesn’t even know. You’re believing negative things about someone you based on thoughts, perceptions, suggestions, and insinuations. If you ever want to know what’s in your heart towards someone, consider what you’re willing to believe about them, without question. Unbeknownst to you, what you choose to believe and act on because of that belief, concerning someone else is actually causing you to sow seeds against yourself that you will have to reap.  You’re too mature to go rob a bank or shoot someone, but all the enemy has to do is plant a thought in your mind about someone and then you start believing it.  This negative thought influences your actions, and your speech towards that person, which can have dire consequences for you.

BeautifulWildFree: How do you know the thought is enemy?

Tera Carissa Hodges: God is not a gossip.  Read your word – if God is giving you thoughts about someone, He will lead you to pray.  If it makes you gossip, hate someone, or judge someone, it’s not from God.  God reveals truth in context. A truth about someone out of context is still a lie. Furthermore, God only reveals in order for people to be shown mercy and extended compassion.  If you look at David and Bathsheba, a wrong action was committed, but when the Prophet Nathan received the truth about the situation, he went directly to David.  This caused David’s repentance.  Also notice, Nathan ONLY went to David, and did so privately.

When negative things happen, always seek God for the purpose of why He allowed the revealing of that thing.  Then you’ll see the light at the end of the tunnel.  The enemy specializes in overwhelming you with emotions and sadness, but the moment you turn your attention from that to what you can learn from this experience, you’ll start seeing why it happened.  Bathsheba’s story didn’t end with David.  God had a plan for her lineage!  When you get to Matthew 1, you see Bathsheba being included in the lineage of Jesus.  Even though she couldn’t get her old life back, she was rewarded with Solomon.

BeautifulWildFree: How have you seen seemingly negative situations working out for your good in your own life?

Tera Carissa Hodges: People who know me know that I strive to be Proverbs 31 woman. But before I even graduated in 2005 from FAMU in journalism, I had landed interviews with celebrities.  But when I graduated, God said if you will give me your television career, I will give you much more.  I decided to follow God.  I gave that career up to be in ministry, and it didn’t make sense until 2009 when I got the opportunity to be interviewed in major magazines and be featured in media.  I also had worked my way up the ladder in Corporate America, and as of 2014, I have been fully restored in that area as well.

When things have to change for a season, you won’t always like or understand it, but if you refuse to get bitter, something good can come out of it.

BeautifulWildFree: What’s the next step for a woman who is tired of dealing with bitterness?

Tera Carissa Hodges: After you admit that you’re bitter, you have to forgive yourself for being bitter.  Why?  Because the enemy will come in with shame and try to make you feel badly about yourself. Next, choose to be happy.  Sometimes, you have to schedule to be happy. It’s a decision.  I once heard Mike Murdock say, “Schedule your pleasure, because your pain will schedule itself.”  You don’t know when tragedy will happen but you can schedule your pleasure.  So make a decision to be happy.

BeautifulWildFree: What’s a final thought you would like to share?

Tera Carissa Hodges: I’m a believer who believes we’re in the end times.  The Word says that man’s love for each other would wax cold and bitterness, envy, hatred and strife would increase.  As a believer you don’t have to become bitter, you don’t have to become hateful.  You have a choice.  If you’re jealous, you’re counting up others blessings instead of your own.  The reality is God has done wonderful things for you too, but you’ll miss it if you look at other people’s blessings.  Praise God for what He’s doing in your life.

Everything serves a greater purpose in your life. Nothing you’ve been through has been wasted.  What you hate in this season, you’ll love in the next season!

Erin Marie is a passionate lover of Jesus Christ, bestselling Author, compelling Speaker & Founder of BeautifulWildFree. She personally embraces a purpose of empowering women to rediscover their beauty, purpose and sense of self through a love-encounter with Christ. Connect with her online via Instagram, Pinterest & Twitter: @bwfwoman

4 Comments

  1. Regina Wilson

    June 24, 2015 at 4:45 pm

    Awesome post and a true read! Good topic and reminder to become BETTER and not BITTER!

  2. Sal sabree

    June 26, 2015 at 12:19 am

    Sister Hodges is a wonderful woman of God! And plants a beautiful seed in you! Allow God to use you to your copacity like I believe he is using her! God Bless and thank you!

  3. Sharon

    January 23, 2016 at 8:13 am

    great post

  4. Mary

    January 23, 2016 at 8:36 am

    This is such a powerful revelatory teaching.I was played by the hands of the enemy but I Thank you fir sharing this teaching,This teaching have change my mind as well as thought process as well as repentance! Thank You Once Again For Sharing,Caring,& Helping!
    Sincerely,
    Mary

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